Backward

I want to take your reflection and live in it
As you reside in the world
Of hope amongst other’s chaos
I see your light and want to touch it
Please share it, give it freely
For some of the dim seek the shine
as they sink into darkness…
~AKC~
©5/24/18

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Mixed messages.

I want to lay myself down, relax and just be
But
Something inside me
Stops me
From being free
A wish to be more
then a girl lying on the floor
run down by life
I wanted to live no more.
Confronted by confusion
attempting a solution
as the sun sett, and the wind rose
blowing the willow trees against the sill
I gasped for breath amongst my tears spilling
Then I got up again.
~AKC~
©5/24/18

Distinguishing life

I trip on the road and look up to see a crow. He’s sitting in a tree just staring at me. Then he lets out a loud annoying caw as if I’m bothering him. A majestic creature overlooked every day sits there staring at me. I pull my hoodie up over my head to continue walking. It fly’s in front of me then settles on the tree to the left of me. I shrug my shoulders wondering what’s up with him. Maybe he’s having a bad day too.

~AKC~

©4/26/18

Wonders

Pop pop pop
Go your dreams
 letting the doubts
And
Fears burn brighter than the light inside  
Allowing those voices to get the best of you
Wondering what the critiques will be
How will they see what I choose to display
Perspectives of varying vices might make you fall
Are you willing to evolve past this?
Sing out your song
Let go
Carry on
And
Just be
As you are

Angela K. Crandall

©11/24/17

 

Splendor

I want to be here, in somewhere else

Not knowing

Existing

Moment by moment

In the second’s, others said I wasted

Relishing in each lazy haze

Where my completeness is your undoing.

Angela K. Crandall

©3/17/17

 

Social needs

                 Filling up with unneeded things to replace what we cannot find. Is it wasteful? Useless? But it does make sense. An attempt, to fill a gap, an empty space, a void in life. It isn’t often it comes to a person without hard work. However, what happens when you’ve tried so adamantly, a hole is worn. As if, you’d kept that pair of sneakers on for months. Never taking them off, you continue to walk towards your destination. One never reached. Each time you stick out your hand to greet someone, embrace them, attempting to make contact you’re denied. When you’re not, it’s a passing by of acquaintances. It’s always, we should do coffee or let’s hang out sometime. Then time passes and nothing occurs. You yearn for new relationships of liberal knowledge. Friendships that cannot be overturned by differences. Still, those sneakers are wearing pretty thin. The souls shot like old skin. The paths I’ve chosen are unlike many. People turn their heads away. When they turn towards me, it’s in pity. When it’s not that, it’s for a need. I am there for you. I always am, I say. I’m not at all perfect. I am full of faults. When I thought I’d found a friend again, it was false. I used to think-most people were good. Now I am leery. Even now, I quickly open up. What’s wrong with me? How can I be so compassionate about others and their lives? Yet, when I am. I feel I’m in the wrong. Asking for someone to listen, to understand me. So it is easier not to upset the masses. I turn to those I have always known. Deep inside there’s a spark of hope. That I, will someday find a best friend again. One who lives close. For-there, are still a few who get me. They are just so far away. It seems impossible to connect. Facebook isn’t friendship, and I know people say don’t let distance get in the way but it does.-Angela K. Crandall©11/28/16

Exploding inward

“Keep wanting to be seen, Heard, made to matter
All I get is T.V. chatter
Angsty games played
Out of the line, I crawl burrowing myself into a hole in the wall
You might as well pack it in
I keep beginning again
Over and over
You continue to bury me
Saying come out and play
You can make it
You will fit in
My disfigured puzzle piece won’t let me in.”
~Angela K. Crandall~
©5/10/16

Things people make me question.

 

 

Why do people say, if you want to be loved, you are too demanding?
Wanting to be understood means that other’s have to follow your path.
That needing a person is wrong.
Because even though at times I desire to be alone
I long for human companionship.
The comfort of my pets is pleasing, often fulfilling.
But it does not replace my need for human contact.

~Angela K. Crandall~
©2/8/16