I’ve been gone….

 working every day in many ways

I am a wife, writer, non-profit retail worker

A friend to a few

Each day I attempt to take it in 

Not waste a minute

Give and get, then give again

I’m not  free of imperfections

are you?

The cycle of the circle

In 24 hours 

The sun rises and falls

And someday we fall to

How do you want them to recall you?

Will you struggle for your dream? 

Give up something for passion only you can see.  

Then hope when someone opens the book, reads the words, they too will be touched.

It’s why I’ve been away.

And Poetry…

I’ve been writing it, just for another book.

Anticipating that someone will understand what I have to say

If not today perhaps tomorrow, or much later when I’m gone.

Angela K. Crandall

©6/1/17

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A new Moon

“The best thing about myself, is my heart.

Although, it’s been broken in the past, it hasn’t led me wrong.

It’s a reminder that not everyone can be trusted, but that I want to trust everyone.

 I suppose most people are good until proven otherwise.”

~Angela K. Crandall

©11/16/15

November ponderings

As the leaves fall outside my window. I realize dreams can make you believe you’re in reality. I’ve woken up before acknowledging that occurrences have happened when in actuality I was just in my unconscious again reeking havoc on me. I toss off my bed sheets and supply myself with loads of expectations for the day to be done. I’ll uncover this mystery of life somehow in the lie others might try to spin around me. I’ll seek peace, hope, and guidance yet, be skeptical, cautious, and aware of things around me. I will be.

-Angela K. Crandall

©11/1/15

Me

“I’m the girl who always tried to please others, who is trying to please herself.

I have made mistakes, faced my past, and am always looking for my future.

 Life feels like one big test in which you never know if you are winning or losing.”

~Angela K. Crandall~

©10/8/2015

Switching to sleep…

Allow me to rest, my head upon this pillow
Giving myself
The grace, I lost
Once entrusted
I sit down to pray my life away
Wondering if anyone is really listening
For it is dwindling
Lost
Fearful
Uneasy
With all that is before me, below, beneath, or above
Respite is for those, without thoughts.
by
Angela K. Crandall
©9/21/15

Purgatory…

I feel as if I am on trial

for all that I am in denial

No longer can I tell who is right or wrong

On or off

Derailed, or on target

Now I am just standing in the middle of it all

watching traffic.

by

Angela K. Crandall

©9/20/15

Bearing Burdens

If I confessed my sins
I’d be damned and damned again
It wouldn’t end my crippling feat
Left to repeat
For what matters all the good I’ve done?
I want to run, to flee, escape
Breathing again, fresh air
A smile upon my face no longer, pasted there for show
Really, there you know?
Finding happiness again.
If I confessed, would you love me less?
Each hour of the day thoughts displayed
Opposing views collide, explode, igniting into flames
Where is the peace in our exaltation?
When comfort is found, in what others consider sin.
We’ll be damned and damned again
Once confessed there is nothing
Only emptiness
Perhaps a void to be filled
Confess to me, why things are this way?
Reveal to me, my purpose, for it has, is lost to me
All I know are wants and needs
Tired of the stepping stone I’ve become upon my confession.
I lay down my pen.
I’ve nothing left to share, nothing left to bare.
You’ve seen my soul.
Why are you still hidden?
by
Angela K. Crandall
©9/20/15

Four paws of Inspiration

Good news

I awoke alive

Sun shining

Fan spinning

Light fragments blazed

Radiating into my room

An orange kitty jumped upon my bedside

Crawled under the shades

To soak it all in

I flutter a bit not wanting to emerge

From the silky sheets that cover up my body still at rest

Mr. Butters springs up to peer at me eager for his morning stroll

“One minute,” I say! Inflicting myself with the will to move, and sit up, out of my daze

Not to give up and just lye there.

Instructing enthusiasm to take shape sitting on the edge of my bed

My feet barely touching the floor

Creating pressures to propel myself

Out of the dark shades into the daylight hour…

By

Angela K. Crandall

© 7/9/15

Colliding, exploding, exerting myself onto the world…(Poetry, and Song)

The world it comes crashing down on me

Beware of the friendly things you see

Innocents is swept away

I keep singing anyway

And the world it crashes down on me

All the silly games we play

Let nothing get in the way

Still it comes crashing down

The thunder rolls right into town

I feel the rain upon my checks

Trickles down before I see

 Lightening shining over me

 Never can I make up my mind

Telling my truth all the time

It’s when it opens up the blinds

People often shut doors

*Unable to explore not desiring the things I see

The world it comes crashing down on me

Beware of the friendly things you see

Innocents is swept away

I keep singing anyway*

And the world it crashes down on me

Remind myself it’s my truth, not theirs

So I better be prepared…

Fireworks flying in the sky

I no longer see the reason why

*The world it comes crashing down on me

Beware of the friendly things you see

Innocents is swept away

I keep singing anyway

And the world it crashes down on me*

Independence is important too

So why the hell does it make me feel blue?

Most the soldiers had to die

I don’t the reason why

We can’t take care of them too

Then others judge my views

 Have it all crash down on me

I’m not winning popularity

But to myself I’m always true

*The world it comes crashing down on me

Beware of the friendly things you see

Innocents is swept away

I keep singing anyway

And the world it crashes down on me*

What are we going to do?

It’s as if life is a TV show

How can we make it stop?

Will it crash down on you or not?

Rise up and tell your truth

Don’t be mute

Take the risk

Exist

If we have to let the world collide

Every truth will be our guide

Nothing left to hide

Like waves will crash

As we clash.

*The world it comes crashing down on me

Beware of the friendly things you see

Innocents is swept away

I keep singing anyway

And the world it crashes down on me*

By

Angela K. Crandall

©7/4/15