Everything I’m fighting for seems
So far away
The letters on the page
Work is written not in hours,
Months planned awaiting something further
To be someone of importance
Not just a day job
Why did I struggle to go to college?
What did it pay for?
Only to make me question everything
Whilst I ponder those who accept it
Melt into it
As I pursue pushing it
claiming, I am compelled by madness
In my need to rise above the selected
Societal ladder made to climb, push, break,
To bend it til you crash!
I’m the mad women
The one they warn you of
Who needs beyond belief?
Whose words are seen or unseen?
As you shove them aside
I let them guide me
Leading to my fate
A sharp rock in the water
Sitting patiently to be polished
Not just waiting either
Taking created goals
Maintaining them in spite of obstacles,
Setbacks, the life that gets in the way.
Even as I wonder if the drive will
Knowing that I must make it
Even if you manipulate me to believe
I’ll only fall
Now and forever
If my destiny is failure
I’m not allowed to give in
To demolish my faith
That it’s worth it.
Something I cannot see won’t let me.
Like guilt in my gut
Stretching through seconds
Angela K. Crandall